It is a day of national celebration
Of circumstance and pomp and pageantry
We all will come together as a nation
To celebrate the Diamond Jubilee
To be our sovereign for sixty years!
Her Majesty, of course, deserves our cheers
We come together to enjoy this day
There’s bunting over every street. Hooray!
At all the ships along the Thames we stare
We do not mind how much we’ve had to pay,
So pleased that in this special day we share.
I never did so well in education
I didn’t go to university.
I haven’t really got an explanation
But academia was not for me.
But now I need a job and it appears
I am unqualified, and in arrears
The people at the jobcentre all say
On benefits I can’t just sit and play
I’ve got to work for nothing on ‘workfare’.
They tell me what to do. I say ‘OK’.
So pleased that in this special day I share.
There’s so much unemployment and inflation
The country is a shambles, honestly
From all this stress, we need a nice vacation
Something to take your minds off it, you see!
Ignore your empty cupboards, dry your tears,
And drink her health in heavily taxed beers!
In olden times, the ancient Romans, they
Would call this ‘Bread and Circuses’: a way
To stop you thinking ‘this is so unfair!’
The celebrations make you want to stay,
So pleased that in this special day you share.
I find it hard to master my frustration
I just don’t know why everyone can’t see
They seem indignant at my indignation
They think that in this country we are free
The most oppressed, the immigrants and queers
Are dancing in the streets despite the jeers
They seem to think the Queen loves them today,
As they love her. Such trust she will betray!
Instead of partying, we should prepare
For revolution! Havoc! Join the fray!
So pleased that in this special day we share.
This outpouring of love and adoration
All of this fuss and nonsense, just for me!
I’d rather spend my time in contemplation
For once, not be the Queen, but simply… be.
I know I haven’t got long and the fears
Are growing as my final hour nears
I know I cannot ask them if I may
Just sit and have a nice cup of Earl Grey
And boycott this ridiculous affair.
No, I can never, ever disobey.
So pleased that in this special day I share.
It’s nearly done, This opulent display
Of privilege, this royal cabaret
But those of us who question it, beware
They do not like to hear us saying ‘nay’
So pleased that in this special day we share.
Tom Juniper Poetry 