Unlucky 13! A bit of doggerel about our meal last night.
Do the dishes have milk in? You don’t really know.
So back to the kitchen to ask you will go.
Our dining companions, meanwhile, are amazed
To be told that there can be milk in mayonnaise.
It turns out there is, but not in the tempura.
(We check it all twice just to be a bit surer)
You tell us the sauces will come on the side.
The food, when it comes, makes us think that you’ve lied.
But it CANNOT be mayo, mixed up with the fish,
When you promised an allergy friendlier dish.
Our allergy sufferer, feeling embarrassed
Asks your colleague, not wanting to make you feel harassed.
He looks at our table, and tells us that yes,
Nearly all of the dishes have milk, he’ll confess.
Because you, my dear waitress, have been a bit silly
Didn’t think mayo counted if mixed up with chili.
And this misconception we’ve quite often faced:
That an “allergy” just means “They don’t like the taste.”
Dear waitress, in this case, disaster averted,
But I must say you made me feel quite disconcerted:
You could poison a person with your attitude,
Some people get sick, even die from some food.
And most people will trust what their server has said
You will never get tipped if your customer’s dead.
Tom Juniper Poetry 