Sestina Day 65: Kick His Ass

OK, It’s YouTube Day 2!

I love this kid. She’s great. I feel so sorry for her: you can see the complete bafflement in her eyes at how not-seriously her mom is taking her predicament.
Of course, again, this is a totally fictional, imagined response to the video. Also, I know she’s saying “kick his ask” but, damnit, she means “ass”!

Today I watched a movie with my mommy.
I was concerned because there was a monster.
And he was gonna kick the good guy’s ass.
He’s trapped behind the television screen.
But I think that he’s going to come out.
And if he does, I know what I must do.

My mommy asked me what I said I’d do.
I wouldn’t let a monster get my mommy.
I guessed that she was scared he would come out
And get us. I would save her from the monster.
If he came through the television screen.
I told her I would kick the monster’s ass.

She giggled when I said I’d kick his ass.
And said it wasn’t nice, what I would do
If he came through the television screen.
I couldn’t quite believe it, that my mommy
Would take the side of some big scary monster
Who’d kick her ass if ever he got out.

I realised that I’d have to spell it out
For Mommy. “He is gonna kick my ass!”
She laughed at me. I told her: if the monster
Was gonna come in here, I’d have to do
Something to save us both. I love my mommy.
But she thinks that the television screen

Can keep the monster out. It’s just a screen!
It cannot keep a scary monster out!
I couldn’t understand it, but my mommy
Told me I shouldn’t say a word like ‘ass’
It’s not a nice word. ‘kick his butt’ would do.
It seemed a little petty when a monster

Could get us any minute. But a monster
Is not as scary, snarling through the screen,
When we have no idea what he might do,
As me, your little girl, cursing him out.
It’s worse for you if I say ‘kick his ass’
Than if a monster comes? You’re crazy, Mommy!

I know what I will do now, if the monster
Comes for my mommy through the TV screen.
I’ll curse him out, and then I’ll kick his ass.